2019英语幽默故事汇总

学生知道或不知道的单词会出现在英语故事中，这个单词的重复会加深学生对单词的记忆。这种记忆不是死记硬背，而是让学生在不知不觉中记住。这个小边为您整理了一个英语幽默的小故事，供您阅读和参考。

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英语幽默故事1

Don't Pick Up the Money on the Ground

An economist professor and a student are walking down the street when they see a $20 bill lying on the sidewalk in front of them. The student goes to pick up the money but his professor stops him and tells him not to bother.

Why not?

If it were a real twenty-dollar bill, someone would have picked it up already.

Everything that can be invented has been invented.

不要在地上捡钱

一位经济学教授和一名学生走在街上，看到一张20美元的钞票躺在前面的人行道上。学生们走过去准备捡起它。教授阻止了他，告诉他不要自找麻烦。

为什么不捡呢？

如果是真正的20美元钞票，早就有人捡了。

发明的一切都已经发明出来了。

英语幽默故事2

The Less You Know, the More Money You Make

Theorem: Engineers and scientists will never make as much money as business executives.

Now a rigorous mathematical proof that explains why this is true:

Postulate 1: Knowledge is Power.

Postulate 2: Time is Money.

As every engineer knows, Power=Work/Time. Since Knowledge=Power, and Time=Money, we have

Knowledge=Work/Money. Solving for Money, we get: Money=Work/Knowledge.

Thus, as Knowledge approaches zero, Money approaches infinity regardless of the Work done.

Conclusion: The less you know, the more money you make.

知识越少，赚的钱就越多

定理：工程师和科学家应该比经济专家赚的钱少。

以下是对定理的严格数学证明：

假设一:知识就是力量(Power)。

假设二:时间就是金钱。

每个工程师都知道：功率：(Power)= 。既然知识=力量，时间=金钱，我们有：知识= 。求解金钱表达式，我们得到：金钱= 。

因此，当知识趋于零时，无论你做了多少努力，金钱都趋于无限。

结论:知识越少，赚的钱就越多。

英语幽默故事3

They Should Be Playing at Night

A therapist, a priest and an economist go golfing. The group ahead of them is extremely slow, leading to some frustration among the three. Their complaints are overheard, and a man from the group ahead walks over to them. He introduces himself as an aide because the group of golfers he is with is blind! The aide thanks the three in appreciation for their patience for the blind golfers. The priest goes, "Oh no, all my life I've preached for all to be better to my fellow man and here I am complaining about the blind!" The therapist says, "I've been trained my whole life to help others and here I am complaining about the blind, shame on me!" The economist says, "Oh no!" The economist says, "Oh no! They should be playing at night."

他们应该在晚上打球

神父、心理学家和经济学家一起打高尔夫。前一组的打球进度极其缓慢，这让三人大为恼火。他们开始抱怨，前一组的一个人听到了抱怨。他自我介绍说他是前一组球员的助手，因为他们都是盲人。助手感谢他们三个耐心等待。神父听后说：哦，不是吗？我一生都在祈祷同胞们过上更好的生活，但我在这里抱怨这些盲人！心理学家也很快说：我一生的信条是帮助别人，但我在这里抱怨这些盲人，我真的很惭愧！这时只听经济学家说：哦，别这样！他们应该在晚上打球。”

英语幽默故事4

A fellow pilot flying over the Midwest heard an air-traffic controller trying to contact an airliner for normal frequency change.“Flight 354，“said the controller，"contact Kansas City Center on frequency 135.5.“The request was repeated several times with no reply from the pilot.Finally，in exasperation the controller raised his voice."Flight 354，Simon says contact Kansas City Center on frequency 135.5.”The call was acknowledged with an emharrassed reply and prompt compliance.

一名飞行员听说地面指挥塔的指挥官在中西部上空呼民航调整其正常接收频率。"354航班，指挥塔在呼叫，请联系堪萨斯市中心135.5频率。这个指令重复了几次之后，没有得到任何回复。最后，指挥塔的指挥员显然被激怒了，他大声尖叫："354航班，西蒙速度和135. 5预率联系。这一声明显奏效，只听对方匆匆回答，迅速服从指挥。”

英语幽默故事5

Even My Driver Can Answer that Question

A famous game theorist, having won the Clark prize, was set to give a series of lectures at prestigious universities throughout the northeast. For the task, he hired a car and driver to take him from place to place . With nothing else to do, the driver would sit in on the highly technical lectures. After several lectures, the driver commented to the economist, "You know, I've heard your lecture so much that I think I could deliver it myself." The economist found this idea intriguing and decided to switch places with him at his next lecture.

The driver gave the talk flawlessly. However, after the lecture, some one in the audience asked him a rather technical question that the driver had no idea how to even begin to answer. The driver considered it for a moment, and then replied, "That question is so easy, even my driver can answer it."

甚至我的司机也能回答这个问题

一位著名的博弈论专家一获得克拉克奖，就开始在东北各知名大学举办一系列讲座。为了完成这项任务，他租了一辆车，雇了一个司机带他到处赶。没有别的事可做的司机坐在课堂上听科技含量高的专家讲座。经过几次讲座，司机对经济学家说：我听了这么多次你的讲座，我想我可以自己说。经济学家认为这个想法很有趣，所以他们决定在下次讲座中交换位置。

司机完美地完成了演讲。但讲座结束后，观众问了他一个技术含量很高的问题，他不知道如何回答。司机沉思了一会儿，回答说：这个问题太简单了，连我的司机都能回答。